Day 44 - Peace comes from following your gut

There is so much to be said for faith and although I've lived like I've lost it over the past years, if I'm honest with myself, I've never stopped believing all that I've been taught. I've just stopped doing what I know I should. So it should be no surprise to me that I've reached that place where it's time to do some honest reflection and listening.

This requires quiet. That's not easy in my life. I am always moving, doing, listening, playing music, multi-tasking. I used to joke that I had become and expert at "creative avoidance." It's not funny anymore. To sit quietly with my thoughts is tough. It's really hard to hear that internal voice again. I have been silencing it for way too long.

Tonight, as I picked up Sean's afghan, I did not allow myself to think of the fact that in two short year's he'll be planning where he's going to pack it up and move it to. College is right around the corner. As row after row of consistent pattern works it's magic, I feel peace. I feel content in the joy that this product and the process by which it is made brings. I know the love that is captured in each block. I know that will follow him where ever he goes.

As the evening goes on and the noise of the FB chatter and Idol fade, I begin to hear that peaceful voice feeding my creative side again. I hear the direction it it leading me in and I am listening. Life is too short to be moving in the wrong direction or to be planted in the fear that long ago captured you. Like the pattern unfolding, that voice can create something beautiful and lovely and exactly what is was designed to create - if we could only just have fail and listen